Divorce is very traumatic experience, but you can get over it. You can still be happy. If you're waiting for happiness, you'll miss it. Because happiness is not something you find. Happiness is something you bring from inside out. When you learn to trigger your own happiness from within, then you will attract happy people into your life. Because like attracts like. And birds of the same feathers like to flock together. Whatever you focus on, you will attract into your life.
Life after divorce is a new chapter. So start by looking at it as a new beginning, instead of an end. Don't let divorce deprive you from a life of joy. Accept that it has happened and move on. Healing happens one day at a time. And the quicker you start, the quicker you'll be free of all emotional baggage and garbage, trying to pull you down. It is easy to start worrying about how you will survive. Don't worry about how you will survive. You will survive, you survived before him/her, and you will survive after him/her. Use this time to transform your life by re-energizing your life with increased positive mental attitude.
Top 10 Tips for Coping With Divorce
Keep a journal. Writing down your painful feelings is a good way of getting rid of it. And walking through the pain, anger and sadness. It helps you get it off our chest, onto a paper. Journaling will help you to understand your feelings more and lead to increased self awareness.
Eat good mood food. It's time to look after yourself more. Start by Combining a high-protein food, like beans, chicken, cheese and fish, with a complex Carbohydrates, like brown rice, brown pasta, brown bread and green vegetables. will boost your energy and mood. Protein also boosts your brain chemicals production, of chemicals like dopamine which keeps you alert , and serotonin your feel good brain chemical .And Carbohydrates help you feel calm, energetic and focused.
Exercise is a mood elevator. Exercise also increases the level of your feel good brain chemicals, like endorphine, serotonin, dopamine and adrenaline. They lift you up, regardless of your circumstances. They help us to be more optimistic, have better clarity and to be better at handling stress. Exercise also give you a great body shape and fit body.
Forgive and forget Don't be bitter, be better. Tell yourself you are better than bring bitter. Bitterness is like a cancer, that eats people up. And spreads to every area of their life. Forgiveness is something you do for yourself, not for your ex. Because it frees you of unnecessary emotional baggage. Forgiving actually takes you out of victim mentality, to a victor mentality. Forgiveness give you opportunity to transform your life. And turn your trial into triumph. And to turn your mess into a message. It also protects you against anger and frustration.
Reduce your intake of stimulants, such as tea, coffee, chocolate, alcohol and cigarettes. They are mood depressant. They give you a high , followed by a great low.
Our pattern of thinking have an impact on happiness. What you habitually say to yourself determines your level of happiness. when you think about your divorce, If say to yourself, that your divorce is your ex partner's loss, you are less likely to feel down, but if you keep saying horrible things to your self, you will lose your joy, and become bitter. Develop a habit of talking yourself back into happiness, anytime you are down. Tell yourself things that will heal your soul,regardless of what happened: Proverbs 16:24 - "Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, Sweetness to the soul and health to the bones." (NIV)
If you want to be happy, sow a seed of happiness to others. You reap what you sow. Sow kindness and reap happiness. Get together with other people going through divorce in your area. Set up a group, or join one. And help each other to heal: Proverbs 11:17 - "A kind man benefits himself, but a cruel man brings trouble on himself. "(NIV)
Focus on what is good about your life. Focus on what you learned from your marriage. You attract into your life ,whatever you focus on. Our outlook always affects our level of happiness. Make your cup half full, and not half empty. Life has wrongly trained us to focus on what's wrong. But the more we focus on what's wrong, the more we attract the wrong things into our mind. And whatever has access to your mind, will eventually have access to your life. This is why some people keep choosing the wrong type of partner, subconsciously. Focus and lack forgiveness can immobilize us, from going forward.
Write A Letter, to your ex about how they hurt you. Don't hold anything back. Pour out your heart in to the letter. Don't mail it to them, burn it. The letter is for your emotional healing. To get things of your chest, so that you can move on. And allow yourself to love again. This will help you to get the pain off your chest, and move on. Instead of keeping things bottled up.
To attract what you want into your life, focus on what you want, and not what you don't want. Let me give you a practical example of how the mind works. If I was to tell you now not to think about an orange, that is exactly what you think about. This is because the brain transmits messages to mind as mental images. So it ignores the word "not", because "not", is not a graphic word. So when you think of positive things, it becomes your focus, and your desire: Philippians 4:8 - "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things." (NIV)
And remember, "happiness is nothing more than a state of mind. Happiness is nothing more than a selective memory. Choose to focus on things that lift you up. And choose to forget things that are trying to drag you down " -- Henrietta Elegunde